Pornography is one of the biggest problems facing the church of today.
Modern technology like smartphones and high-speed internet has made it more accessible, affordable, and anonymous than ever, and it is wreaking havoc in the church by suffocating the spiritual lives of believers, destroying marriages and families, and diminishing the effectiveness of pastors.
Reports show that 85% of young adult men and 50% of young adult women view pornography on a monthly basis. 64% of Christian men and 15% of Christian women watch porn at least once a month.
[epq-quote align=”align-right”]64% of Christian men and 15% of Christian women watch porn at least once a month.[/epq-quote]
Although Christian men and women are called to live holy lives free from sexual immorality (1 Thessalonians 4:3-8), some feel powerless to break off the chains of lust and shame that pornography use has put around them. Questions swirl around in their minds like: “Why do I keep falling back into the same sin?” “Why can’t I quit this destructive behavior?” “Where is the freedom that we are promised in Christ?”
If this describes you or someone you know, take heart. The power sin is no match for the power of the Savior who has conquered sin and set us free from the law of sin and death! Breaking free from habitual sin like pornography requires a change in your relationship with God, a change in your view toward sin, and a change in your relationships with others. This article will provide an overview of biblical principles and list many Bible verses/passages that apply to this common, yet dangerous struggle.
A quick word on how NOT to use this post: Do not think that adding these 10 biblical principles to your to-do list is the highway to perfection. Truth be told, purity is not the main goal. Honoring God by showing our love to Him in holiness in all areas of life is the main goal. We need to press into the grace of God shown to us in Christ and receive transformation that is from Him.
At the end of this article I list several recommended resources for living in purity. I pray that if you looking for how to stop a porn addiction, you will find the grace and power of Christ more than adequate to help you to break free from sin’s grasp and live a holy life for His glory.
(Titus 2:11-14; Psalms 107; Romans 5:17; Psalms 34; Jeremiah 3:21-25)
Apart from the grace of God, we are powerless to turn from sinful habits. Psalm 34:17 says, “When the righteous cry for help, the LORD hears and delivers them out of all their troubles.” If you find yourself burdened by the sin of lust, cry out to God for deliverance and the grace to change. Christ can give you a new heart, restored joy, a clean and restored conscience. True change cannot happen apart from God’s grace, so as you continue to read, pray for God’s grace to apply these principles.
(If you don’t know Christ, or are not sure whether you do or not, you need to believe the gospel of Jesus Christ before any of this article applies to you.)
(Ephesians 2:1-10; Titus 2:11-14, 3:3-8; Romans 5:1-11; 1 Corinthians 6:9-10; Matthew 22:37-38)
The root of all porn struggles is idolatry—you love to lust more than you love God. Seek to develop a deeper love for God and a deeper appreciation of His love to you in the gospel. Worship Him for His holiness and grace. God not only provides us saving grace in the gospel, He provides a sanctifying grace that prepares us for service, which is integral to who we are in Christ (Titus 2:11-14). Ask God for a deeper love for Him and deeper understanding of your place in the gospel.
An important part of loving God is rejoicing in the goodness of God’s good design for sexuality: sex between one man and one woman who are committed to each other in covenant for life.
(Proverbs 8:13; 1 Thessalonians 4:8; James 4:4-10; Psalms 51; Matthew 5:4)
Pornography use is idolatry in God’s eyes and is poisonous to relationships with Him (1 Thessalonians 4:8; Jeremiah 2:13; Jonah 2:9). Realize that this sin could destroy you, your family, your marriage, and your witness. Realize the people you lust after are made in God’s image and doing something that will damn them to hell if they don’t repent. Ask God to give you godly sorrow over your sin and practice true repentance (2 Corinthians 7:8-13). Hating your sin and not just it’s consequences means doing everything you possibly can to change, even uncomfortable things.
(Psalms 119:9-11; 1 John 2:14; Romans 15:4; Romans 12:1-2; Colossians 3:16; Psalm 1; Joshua 1:8)
Those who use pornography believe a number of lies telling them that their sin isn’t so bad, it’s not their fault, or a little lust is permissible. We need God’s Word to confront the lies we believe and teach us about God’s beautiful creation in human sexuality that will give us greater angst when we see His created beauty marred by the destructiveness of sin. We need to memorize, meditate on, and treasure God’s words. His Word alone is the sword of the Spirit that will help us the battle against the habitual sin of lust.
(James 5:16; 1 John 1:5-10; Psalm 32; Proverbs 28:13; Leviticus 5:5; Galatians 6:1)
A heart-felt confession of sins is blessed by God and leads to healing and cleansing. Humble yourself before God in confession and plead for God’s help to fight sin. You may also want to confess to a trusted friend, pastor, counselor, or your spouse. Confession can be a tremendously intimidating step for someone struggling—but remember that it can be a vital part of the repentance process. When confessing your sin, exercise wisdom in confession knowing that pornography use is deeply hurtful and deceptive to many involved.
Fighting our sinful habits means not leaving provision for our flesh and removing sources of temptation (Romans 13:14). In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus illustrated the importance of this with the hyperbolic command to tear out your eye if it causes you to sin (Matthew 5:29-30). This could mean setting up filters on your computer, phone, or TV, and throwing out anything that stirs up your flesh. Don’t tolerate your sin any more than you would tolerate an armed killer living in your house. You are weak and need to lay straight paths for your feet so that in a moment of weakness you can stand firm in God’s strength.
“Be killing sin or it will be killing you.” John Owen
(Ecclesiastes 4:9-12; Proverbs 27:17; 2 Timothy 2:22; Galatians 6:1; 1 Thessalonians 5:11)
One of the lies that sin can make us believe is that we are alone with nobody to help us. God has given us the church and the opportunity to have spiritual friends who can help us in our fight against sin. Pray for godly accountability that will drive you away from sin to the Savior. Look into accountability programs like Covenant Eyes that can help you be accountable, but realize an email report does not take the place of life-on-life accountability or remove your sinful desires.
(Ephesians 6:10-20; Psalm 101:3; 1 Peter 1:13; 1 Thessalonians 5:5-8; 1 Peter 5:8-9; 1 Corinthians 10:7-14; Judges 16:4-18; 2 Timothy 2:22; Genesis 4:7; 1 Peter 2:11-12; Proverbs 22:5; Galatians 5:24)
We need to take our fight against the world, the flesh, and the devil seriously. A good athlete studies his opponents on film and replays his own defeats, trying to find moments of weakness he can learn from and strengthen.
We should be as crafty as we can formulating strategies to fight acting out on lust. Brainstorm what lies you have believed and counter them with truth. Analyze your life and common times you are susceptible to temptation, and structure your life in a way that allows you to fight back. In Christ, you are not a slave to sin but have everything you need for living a godly life and overcoming temptation (2 Peter 1:3; 1 Corinthians 10:13).
(Romans 8:1-11; Galatians 5:16-25; 2 Corinthians 3:16-18)
God doesn’t leave us in our battle for sin alone but gives us the greatest possible resource to fight against sin: His Spirit within us. Romans 8:13 says, “For if you live according to the flesh you will die, but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live.” Walking in step with the Spirit will set your mind on spiritual things and not rely on your own strength and wisdom in battling sin.
(Isaiah 40:28-31; Psalm 121; Psalm 40; 1 Corinthians 15:58; Lamentations 3:25-26)
In Christ there is restoration, redemption, and healing. Even though you may be discouraged and face setbacks, put your hope in Christ and keep preaching the gospel to yourself. Know that your efforts and energies to pursue Christ and fight sin are pleasing to Him, and run after Him with all that you have. If you are in Christ, you have a living Savior who lives in you and intercedes for you. If you do fail, don’t let discouragement lead you to despair, but honor Christ by not giving up.
As you grow in grace and more conformed to His image, you will find increased strength and victory. May God strengthen you and equip you for a life of purity and joy in Him!
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